It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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