He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
