Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
