he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
