Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
