why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
