One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
