Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
