Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Randomize