My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
