guys are not supposed to queef...right?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize
