My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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