He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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