Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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