Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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