she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Randomize
