Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
