be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
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