is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
