If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
It's just like the Real World with babies
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Randomize
