i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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