Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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