I wish I could teleport
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I've blown a few things in my day
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
