i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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