I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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