My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Randomize
