we made out on top of his cat.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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