You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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