if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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