i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize