So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize