PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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