yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
He felt like a one man threesome
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize