Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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