Already got asked if we're dating
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Randomize
