I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
