i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
We have so much sex to catch up on
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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