in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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