I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize