There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
