when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
