would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Randomize