YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
