That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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