Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
