if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize
