so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
