in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
i think my cat just said my name.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Randomize
