they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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