Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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