Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
