girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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