Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize